Breakthrough
by Mare Liberum
Summary: Cameron takes a leave of absence from PPTH after having a manic episode and being diagnosed with bipolar disorder. During her time away, she teaches a seminar at Princeton where she meets a fellow professor, with whom she becomes enamored. Cameron must face herself, her feelings, and House in order to create a life for herself that is worth living. I would love any and all feedback
1. Chapter 1

Cameron sat in her car listening to the news on public radio as she waited for the digital clock on her dash to hit 11:34.

Today was her first day lecturing as an adjunct at Princeton and she had everything planned out. Everything had been planned out for three days now. Her favorite suit had been laid on the floor next to her bed and her wallet and keys were on the table by the door.

Of course the morning did not go as planned and Cameron grimaced as she recalled waking up teary and agitated for no apparent reason.

_Stupid_, she thought as she got out of the car. _What the hell is wrong with me?_

Cameron, however, could not have predicted what had happened this morning let alone what had happened in the last four months. So much had changed. She had always been so sure of herself, so secure. But now, she did not know what to expect. Her mood and emotions were all over the place and that scared her.

Bipolar disorder.

It all happened so insidiously. The first year she had spent with House was pure exhilaration. She loved the thrill of snooping around, bending the rules, and solving cases, but the hospital and the triple shifts had begun to dominate her life. She no longer had any way to judge her own reality, and when she began to talk fast, walk fast, and notice that her thoughts were moving more and more quickly, she figured it was all just a result of the job. She no longer had time to eat, or sit, or sleep. None of that had seemed to matter anymore. It was all superfluous. She was solving cases with House and having a damn good time. That was all that mattered.

"Stupid", she muttered aloud this time, admonishing herself under her breath. She didn't want to think about that right now. She didn't want to think about House.

Cameron braced herself against her car for a few seconds to steady her shaky legs. She had lost quite a bit of weight and felt dizzy and weak whenever she stood up. She then hiked up her baggy trousers, slung her messenger bag over her shoulder, and began making her way across the green and into the lecture hall.

As she approached the front door, she felt the heat of the sun through her wool suit and basked in it for a moment before entering.


	2. Chapter 2

Allison Cameron waited for the last student to file out of the lecture hall before grabbing her messenger bag and making her way down the hallway to the biology department. When she got to the main office, the secretary, an older woman wearing a Talbot's sweater set, was genuinely pleased to see her.

"You must be Dr. Cameron! Aren't you just darling! I'm Pamela, but call me Pam. We are so glad you are here!"

Cameron smiled as some of her doubt left her. It would be good to be here for a while instead of at PPTH.

Pam continued cheerily, "Now, you just follow me and I'll show you where your office is. I cleared out one of the back offices for you so it should be nice and quiet- not a lot of student traffic."

"Thanks", Cameron said, and she meant it. Since her diagnosis with bipolar disorder, she knew that she got overwhelmed more easily. Even now, her thoughts were racing and the flickering of the fluorescent lights in the hallway was beginning to irritate her.

The office was tiny and sparsely furnished. There was only a desk, a low bookshelf, and an orange sofa that had probably been there since the 70s. There were no windows but Cameron noticed that when she pushed the door shut, it closed all the way and the lock worked just fine. Now that she was finally alone, a sudden wave of exhaustion fell over her and she sat on the sofa and closed her eyes

_The scent of Old Spice and alcohol was strong on his skin and Cameron thought, as she ran her hands through his hair, that it gave him a boyish innocence that she had not seen before. This excited her, and she brought her face closer to his, touching their cheeks together in such a way that their lips were almost touching but it was not yet a kiss. Her head was buzzing and when he put his arms around her, an electric shiver ran through her body and she gasped and clutched onto his shoulders. Suddenly, however, the energy between them changed. The smell, his hair, his arms, the moment, they were all becoming too much for her. It was all too much and it was making her angry. Her face began to feel hot and she put her hands on his chest and pushed their bodies apart. He stepped back but faltered on his bad leg and grabbed onto her for support. That made her even angrier and she began jabbing her fists into the soft flesh of his abdomen. This wasn't like her at all. She felt like an animal, feral and out of control, but she could not stop._

Cameron was jolted awake by the ringing of her cellphone and she fumbled to answer it. "Hello?"

"Yes, Hi. This is Dr. Gregory House, you might know me. May I ask, am I speaking to Dr. Jekyll or Ms. Hyde?"

"What do you want, House?" Cameron spat into the phone. She knew that he had no understanding of boundaries or common decency so the call didn't surprise her. More than anything, she was embarrassed. She could chalk her encounter with House up to a slew of symptoms: hyper sexuality, poor judgment, aggression. Deep down, however, she felt a complicated kind of love for House and she had cracked, right in front of him, to reveal a part of herself that even she didn't know. She was made more vulnerable than she had ever been. Though she knew that a relationship could never work between House and herself, she also knew that none of her relationships would ever be the same. She was changing, despite what House would say, and this both thrilled and terrified her.


End file.
